A Chicago Bears Ponzi Scheme: Why We're Stuck in 1985
It all started back in '81. I was just a kid in Jersey, sitting on the couch, when my uncle turned to me and said, "Watch this kid kill these fucking guys." He was talking about Walter Payton, and I was about to witness greatness. The stiff arms, those leaps into the end zone, the forearm shivers to defenders' helmets—he wasn't just running; he was annihilating the competition. And then I heard him speak, and there it was—Walter Payton sounded just like I did back in 5th grade! That day, Payton became my boyhood idol. I was hooked, and just like that, I was a Bears fan for life.
It didn't hurt that Mike Ditka, a fellow Ukrainian and tough-as-nails coach with a perm that screamed "I take no shit," was calling the shots. It was a killer combo, and like most Bears fans, I've stuck around through all the ups and downs ever since. Trust me, there's not enough space on the internet to list all the terrible quarterbacks and mediocre coaches we've endured.
But here we are, heading into the 2024 season again, and the sad cycle continues. The problem? It's not the players, the coaches, or the staff. It's the McCaskey family. As the old saying goes, "The fish stinks from the head." They're the ones hiring these people, setting them up to fail from the jump. They hire underqualified folks and throw them into positions they aren't ready for.
I get it; bad draft picks are part of the game (anyone remember David Terrell at 8th overall? Yeah, that still hurts). But what's truly mind-boggling is how a team with the rich history and tradition of the Bears keeps falling into the same traps. Walter Payton is the Presidential Rolex of the N.F.L., yet here we are, playing like a second-hand Casio that won't keep time.
It's like Martellus Bennett said not too long ago: The McCaskeys are running the greatest legal Ponzi scheme in the N.F.L. They keep selling the legacy of the '85 Bears while desperately trying to recreate it instead of moving forward and building something new. They don't care about the fans—they care about the brand. And it's a strategy ruining careers, one failed season at a time. I can't even imagine how many players' careers have been wasted, and it's not changing unless they finally do the right thing and **sell the team**.
And let me just say this—I'm not hating on Caleb Williams, but the poor kid has more hype than the 2012 Black Sabbath reunion tour. Remember when Patrick Mahomes was sitting behind Alex Smith? There were no hype videos, commercials, or G.Q. covers. People were actually laughing that he played for Texas Tech! But now, it seems like the Bears are setting Williams up to be the next poster child for another failed season instead of giving him the tools to succeed.
Let's talk about the front office for a second. The G.M.? A joke. We still don't have a solid offensive line, and if I remember my Bill Parcells 101 correctly, building a team starts with the offensive and defensive lines. Look at the great coaches—Belichick and Andy Reid. These guys win championships and then go right back to the draft to focus on the O-line. Meanwhile, our G.M. still scratches his head like he's trying to solve a Rubik's Cube.
And then there's our coach, rocking the worst record in Bears history. 11-24. How are we supposed to be "focused as a team" when the H.I.T.S. principle, which was supposed to change the culture, has led to this dumpster fire? If 11-24 is "attention to detail," I've got some beachfront property in Idaho to sell you. Even Matt Nagy had a winning record before he got the boot. But hey, I'm missing something.
Look, I get it—we won Sunday. Hooray. But let's be honest, the game ball should have gone to Will Levis for blowing it. I said we'd be 3-6 by Thanksgiving, and I'm sticking to it.
Now, Houston is coming up on Sunday night, and I think we're all just praying for a miracle at this point. But let's be honest: the Ponzi scheme will keep on chugging along, as it always does.
We're waiting…
